My Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Hey Y'all,
      Sorry for the lack of updates but things have been hectic here. For this blog post I'm going back to October 31st which was my first day in Bonito and what goes down in history as my most embarrassing day ever. Ever. It was painful and for your viewing enjoyment I'm going to relieve it all. Every humiliating detail. Here we go...
                                                                                                                                                                   

My day started at the ungodly hour of six am. I'm exhausted and we all pile in to our luxury bus to head out for our day activities. After a drive, that was unfortunately too short for sleep, we arrive once again in the middle of no where. Theres one of those small vans, the kind associated with either hippies or child abductors, waiting for us. I and five others pile into this strange van that might be taking us to our death and off we go. It was another small drive right up a bumpy hill. It's important for everyone to know that I'm not graceful. I don't have a single graceful bone. I'm just clumsy through and through but this really took the cake. I'm the last person to exit our hippie van and the young good looking driver is holding the door open for me, so what do I do? I get tangled in a seat belt, cut my leg on a sharp part of the seat, bang my knee into the door, and trip and fall, literally, on my face. Yep... I had a large bleeding cut and a bruise on my leg all just from getting out of a car.

Activity one of the day is a canopy walk. Now, I'm afraid of heights but I'm also picturing a nice bridge like structure over the top of the trees for us to stroll on. I could totally handle something like that. Wrong. It was an obstacle course in the trees. An obstacle course complete with trees to use as steps, walking on long thin poles that swing , and a net to climb. I made it through eight of the activities before I started crying big fat crocodile tears and then shaking. One of our leaders was able to convince me to do two more activities before I had a panic attack. I was shaking so hard it looked like I was vibrating, crying huge sobs, and hyperventilating. One of the guides had to take me back but since I hadn't made it far enough to be repelled down I had to turn back and redo the part I'd already completed. During this trip back, the guide walked backwards to hold the obstacles steady since I was shaking so much, I started dry heaving, and at one point I was crouched down clutching a tree and whimpering. He dropped me off on the ground and went to catch up with the others and left me to my own devices in the forest. So of course I sat down and cried for an hour before calling my mother. It was not a proud moment. Only one other person didn't finish. Heights suck.

Don't I look so naive and innocent? Poor child.

I'm the second girl. You can't tell but as this picture was being taken
I was telling the photographer that if he didn't stop shaking the ladder I would
murder him painfully. Canada translated for me. He looked a little scared of me after that. 

Second Activity was archery. Nothing big happened here. No panic attacks here. I won't be the next Katniss Everdeen but I wasn't terrible either.

The photographer probably wouldn't be too happy to see me with a weapon.

Third activity was tubing. This one was my favorite by far but there was still a little humiliation to be had. We walk out there and are preparing to get in our tubes and the man in charge has told us to belly flop onto them (he's clearly Satan). Canada tried to belly flop on but didn't get the right distribution and  went flying into the water. Since I'm such a great best friend I'm standing on the little dock laughing my butt off because what else are friends for? As I'm laughing the man tells me to get on my but I'm still laughing and now I'm also walking so of course I trip over a step and go face first into the water and on to my tube. The distribution was, unsurprisingly, wrong so I go flying into the water. Did I mention there was a photographer there to capture this wonderful moment? Yep...Frame by frame.

As the photographer took it I said,
 "Do you think I want a picture of this?!"

So overall the day involved a lot of humiliation and threatening photographers. As embarrassing as it was I still enjoyed the da, minus the canopy walk. Overall I had fun with most of the activities and now I know to keep my feet firmly on the ground. Tchau!